WNJ Inspires – I am Not My Hair

So this weekend I decided to change my hair, again, lol. I really wanted to embrace my natural hair and play around with different styles. After a few hours of washing, conditioning, and blow drying, I sat in the mirror and shook my head. “Do I really feel like dealing with all this hair?” I asked myself. A couple minutes went but and I just decided to stick it out. I finally found a style that I could work with for a few days. Thank goodness for bobby pins and banana clips, LOL! 😀

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Coat: Simply Be (Similar Styles HERE)/// Dress: Thrifted (pictured HERE)// Scarf: Bakers// Shoes: Thrifted// Sunnies: Purchased at a Shopping Event// Clutch: Love, Cortnie// Jewelry: Charming Charlie

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not a “hair girl”. I like my hair to be healthy and to look nice, but I’m not one to play with styles and try different products. I find a few styles I like and I rotate between them. When it comes to the products I use, I let my hair stylist tell me what’s best and I go from there. However since I’ve been wearing my hair natural for 6 months, I’ve realized how much time and effort it takes to really do my hair. From wigs, extensions and everything in between, I’m tired, LOL! Years ago, my freshman year in college, I wore my hair natural for about 2 years so, I’m no stranger to this process. I’m just at a different place now. Carving out 25-30 extra minutes in the morning to lay my edges down is getting on my last nerve.

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With all that being said, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. By the beginning of the year, I plan to make a decision as to weather or not I’m going to stick it out with my natural hair. People have a lot to say when it comes to hair but when it comes down to it, I have to be the one to deal with it on a daily basis. I have to make me happy and do what’s best for my busy, on-the-go lifestyle. When my hair wasn’t natural, I found it a lot easier to manage. Granted I spent a bit more by going to the hair salon every 2 or so weeks but, it worked for me. Like India Arie said, I am Not My Hair. Natural, permed, whatever – it’s your choice. So we shall see.

As always, I’m interested to know what you think. Does natural hair work better for your lifestyle? Does hair really matter all that much to you? Let me know! TTYS…XO!

all_black 3**Linkups: Tre Chic Thurs, Weds Style Connection, Love it Link it, Style Linkup, Trendril Linkup, Whatever Weds, Wardrobe Wed., WIW,  What I’m Wearing**





  1. says

    For me, my locs are part of who I am as a person. HOWEVER, they do not by any means define me. I prefer my natural hair. I prefer the way I feel when I wear my hair natural. I love to embrace who I am in the raw form. Now if one day, I change my mind and decide to do a quick weave…that’s my prerogative as a woman! After all, we are creatures of whimsy! If you LOVE you…that’s ALL THAT MATTERS! No one has to be you and deal with your hair! I want you to give no fucks as to who has something to say about it! You define your own standard of beauty!
    Rochelle recently posted…Unplugging is MORE THAN Necessary…My Profile

    • Whitney says

      Rochelle, your candid honesty is always appreciated! You are right – as a women, we are indeed creatures of whimsy. We have the right to change and not care who says what. Thanks for the comment & reminder. 😉 XO!

  2. says

    Hair doesn’t matter to me all that much. It doesn’t define me at all. People are shocked to find out that my hair is natural. I started in ’03/’04 and was going strong until ’08 when, frustrated with the natural hair, I decided to perm my hair. A couple months in, I regretted that decision (lolol) and went natural again. The only difference between the first time and this time around is that I’m taking much better care of my hair (the 2nd go-round, I cut off all of my hair to an inch in ’10; the Big Cut (BC). The first round of my natural hair I didn’t do much in regards to maintaining it properly. Hence the frustration.

    Now, I do wear wigs, weave and braids/twists because, really, I like it. But I’m sure they’ll be a day when I rock my natural hair just as it is. Just not right now. Also, this whole thing that natural hair is easier to maintain than permed? Nah. Keeping up with natural hair is high maintenance. HIGH. The only time it was low was when it was barely an inch. Just wash, deep condition and go. But as it gets longer, the maintenance gets higher.

    With all that being said, it’s your hair. Do what you want with your hair. Shave it, color it, dye it, braid it, twist it, pin it up or down, wear it natural or perm. Just don’t do the doobie wrap as a style. There are limits. lolol. Besides that, do you!
    Vivi recently posted…Inspiration #7My Profile

    • Whitney says

      LOL!!! NO way to the doobie wrap style, which I am still confused about, lol. Anyway, thanks for input Vivi! Like you, this is my 2nd go ’round and Mama’s tired, lol. I have definitely taken better care of my natural hair this time around but still, I’m not 100% convinced I’m all in so to speak. We shall see…XO!

  3. says

    You look great mama! Happy Tuesday! I always loved your natural hair and relaxed looks. You have to do what is best for you and who cares what people think because like you said it is your choice. I will say that having a relaxer is indeed less maintenance. You Rock! Happy Tuesday!

  4. says

    Love that coat, I’m all about leather combo pieces this season! Regarding your hair…..I say, do what’s best for you and conducive to your lifestyle. I get the whole natural hair movement, I am natural myself. I’ve never had a perm in my life. Natural hair works for me because I literally wash my hair, throw some leave-in conditioner in and I’m out the door. Pretty easy maintenance, except wash and conditioning days. Best Wishes with your decision. :-)
    Style & Poise recently posted…Tartan BlazerMy Profile

  5. says

    Great honest post. Sometimes I wonder am I still into doing this. I’ve been natural for 8 years so there is no going back for me but I get how the upkeep can be cumbersome at times. I do feel my hair is more than just hair becoming natural was a deeper than just letting my relaxer grow out.

    Love your outfit and your hair looks great.
    Sabrina recently posted…Seriously Natural Boutique Black Friday Giveaway!!My Profile

  6. says

    A black woman’s hair is always a topic for conversation, whether she wears it natural, relaxed or low cut. Every hair style she has is somehow making a statement to the world and most times that isn’t the case. It really comes down to convenience. Just do what’s right for you.
    Ambitious Curls recently posted…Weekly Ambition #6My Profile

  7. says

    Hey there!! I hear you loud and clear. I have been natural for 7 years, and its work. Lately since having the baby I haven’t really wanted to personally do alot to my hair but I always want to look nice… so I have to do my hair! Lmbo!! I am thinking about wearing it straight for Thanksgiving too. Thanks to my new FHI dryer, I can get it straight in 10 minutes!! LOVE THAT!
    Bernetta recently posted…Rising Above It: My Unexpected Road to CollegeMy Profile

  8. says

    You look great in that outfit and rockin’ your Hair. Loving YOU is the most important of all and if the hair gets in the way, make it easy on yourself! I always had a problem with styling hair and now I wear a short, tapered natural because it is easy for me and I am not going out to work everyday. Hair textures are so different and what works for my friend doesn’t work for me, so we all have to go by trial and error. I tried growing out my natural and it was just too much work and I had to spend a small fortune on products seeking the “right” one. When I need a change, I just grab a wig. Do what is comfortable for you and what gives you Joy!
    Neti* recently posted…Celebratin’My Profile

  9. says

    I would definitely say that my natural hair works for me and my lifestyle, but I wouldn’t say it is necessarily easy. The reason I am still hanging on to my natural hair is because it is beautiful, unique, ever-changing, and God-given. I love my natural hair to the fullest, and I would never dream of changing it. But at the same time, you have to do what works for you and makes you happy. If natural hair isn’t working for you, then do what does. Your hair is just that…YOUR HAIR! Neither I nor anyone else can wear it for you. Just do you.

    I, myself, recently decided to change up the amount of time I actually spend on my hair because this natural was really starting to run me crazy. I was just investing too much time in it. Now that I have let up a good bit on my regimen, I actually feel alot better and my hair is doing just fine.

    Great post! Good luck with whatever you decide to do! :)
    Melinda recently posted…Simplifying My Hair RegimenMy Profile

  10. says

    I love your new do! your hair is your hair, you wear it as you please. After all you’re the one who has to live with it. I wear my hair natural and fit my lifestyle, I style my hair once a week and leave it alone, in the morning all I do is untie my satin scarf and head out.
    Fooling with hair in the morning is just not my cup of tea, I was natural before, as a matter of fact I didn’t get a perm until I was 22, and that’s exactly what drove me to the perm! laying edges down every morning, all the brushing and manipulating was hurting me more than helping me. This time around I know better, I think…
    IMO natural hair is not to be fool around with on a daily basis *it will drive you cray-cray* unless that’s your thing
    My advice learn new ways to preserve your do for at least 3-4 days, like the one you have now is gorgeous. if you can keep it a few days I’d say you winning!
    Anointed Heels recently posted…Meet Stella! My Natural Hair Alter EgoMy Profile

    • Whitney says

      LOL at cray-cray! I’m right about there now, hahaha! Thanks for your stopping by to comment! Your hair always looks nice btw. :-)

  11. says

    I feel like we allow our hair to really define us – the expression good hair day exists for a reason! When I was younger I let my hair do what it wanted and I always hated it, I put in in a bun everyday and that was my one and only look. Now I straighten it every and while it might take a little extra time, I’m happy with how it looks and leaving the house without a bun everyday is a wonderful thing.
    lyddiegal recently posted…Distant memoryMy Profile

    • Whitney says

      Aww, thanks so much Rachelle! (Natural) hair is a challenge for sure. Hope your natural hair journey goes well…XO!

  12. says

    Love your coat! For me, it is really hard to go natural! I have thick wavy hair. It is so hard to keep the frizz down. Some days I get lucky, other times I have to work at it.

    Jacqueline recently posted…Wedding Wear….My Profile

  13. says

    Sixteen years ago, when I became a mom, I decided the long hair and hours of styling had to go. My life is very busy and active…swimming, exercise, etc. Having my hair natural makes me feel free and beautiful. For a short time last yesr, I did attempt to grow it out and wrsp it. That lasted all but three weeks. I couldnt wait for that perm to grow out. When my hair stylistcut my hair back off, I wanted to celebrate.
    Glenda recently posted…A Little QuirkMy Profile

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